oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
