So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Randomize
