Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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