so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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