yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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