yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
