dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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