dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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