where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize