I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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