I heard we made out
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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