oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
