he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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