I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
