Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I booty called her while she was in labor.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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