so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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