just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
this will be a night to untag.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
