Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
