He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that