omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
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This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation