is your mom at the bar?
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
