i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
