Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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