the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
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I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
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I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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