And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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