so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Randomize
