hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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