Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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