Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
