I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize