How'd it feel making her break her religion?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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