Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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