While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize