We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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