A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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