i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize