If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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