yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
