i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
