Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
false alarm, still single
Randomize
