Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
