i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
