Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize