Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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