I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
bring money and cleavage
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
