We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
