guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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