My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
