did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize