im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
